Contact and Resistance: How We Dance With the World
Updated: Aug 7, 2025
In Gestalt therapy, contact is at the heart of how we experience life. It’s the way we meet the world through our senses, emotions, and actions. When we are present, open, and alive in our interactions, we’re making good contact. This is when life feels vibrant and connected.
But here’s the thing—staying open isn’t always possible or even wise. Sometimes, we pull back. We protect ourselves. We resist contact.
And that’s not necessarily bad. Resistance can be a healthy, protective act. The trouble begins when resistance becomes an automatic habit, blocking us from the growth and connection we actually want.
Resistance as a Creative Adjustment
In Gestalt therapy, resistance—sometimes called interruption of contact—isn’t seen as a flaw. It’s understood as a “creative adjustment” we made in the past to survive challenges.
Maybe you learned to keep quiet to avoid conflict. Or to smile and change the subject when someone got too close. Or to distract yourself from pain by staying constantly busy.
At the time, these adjustments worked. They kept you safe. The question is: are they still serving you today?
When Resistance Helps
Healthy resistance is part of everyday life. It allows us to set boundaries, avoid toxic situations, and protect ourselves from emotional harm. Used consciously, resistance can be an empowering choice—one that keeps us aligned with our needs and values.
The goal in Gestalt therapy is not to “get rid” of resistance, but to bring it into awareness so we can decide when it’s useful and when it’s getting in our way.
When Resistance Holds Us Back
The same strategies that once helped us survive can become outdated and limiting. Two common examples are:
1. Deflection
Deflection is avoiding direct connection—changing the subject when a conversation gets uncomfortable, joking to avoid feeling vulnerable, or shifting focus to the past instead of staying in the present.
It can be conscious (“I’m not ready to talk about this right now”) or unconscious (“I didn’t even realize I was dodging the question”). Over time, habitual deflection can dull intimacy and keep others from truly knowing us.
2. Desensitization
Desensitization is like “emotional anesthesia.” It’s when we numb our feelings—often through distraction, overwork, or addictive behaviors like drinking, overeating, or scrolling endlessly on our phones.
It’s a creative adjustment that may have helped us cope with trauma, grief, or overwhelming stress. But it also mutes joy, connection, and self-awareness.
Awareness First
In Gestalt therapy, we start by noticing how we make (and break) contact with the world. Instead of trying to force change, we explore:
What am I doing right now?
When did I learn to do this?
Is it helping me today—or holding me back?
Once we bring these patterns into awareness, we have a choice: keep them, adapt them, or try something new.
Because the dance between contact and resistance isn’t about being always open or always guarded. It’s about knowing the steps—and choosing how you want to move.
References & Further Reading
Brownell, P. (2018). Gestalt Psychotherapy and Coaching for Relationships. Taylor and Francis
Clarkson, P. (2014). Gestalt Counselling in Action, 4th Edition. Sage Publications Ltd.
Cole, P. (1994). Resistance to Awareness: A Gestalt Therapy Perspective. The Gestalt
Journal
Ginger, S. (2007). Gestalt Therapy: The Art of Contact. Karnac
Gold, E. & Zahm, S. (2018). Buddhist Psychology and Gestalt Therapy Integrated:
Psychotherapy for the 21st Century. USA: Metta Press
Joyce, P., & Sills, C. (2014). Skills in Gestalt Counselling & Psychotherapy. Sage
Publications Ltd
Koffka, K. (2014). Perception: An Introduction to the Gestalt Theory: A Classic Article
in the History of Psychology. www.all-about-psychology.com
Mann, D. (2010). Gestalt Therapy: 100 Key Points and Techniques. Routledge: USA
Myers, V . (2023). Living in the Here and Now: Embracing Gestalt Therapy for All.
Amazon Asia Pacific Holdings Private Ltd
Perls, F.S, Hefferline, R, & Goodman, P. (1994). Gestalt Therapy: Excitement and
Growth in the Human Personality. USA: The Gestalt Journal Press, Inc.
Perls, F. (1992). Gestalt Therapy Verbatim. The Gestalt Journal Press, Inc.
Perls, F. (1970). What is Gestalt [Video]. YouTube
Skottun, G. & Krüger, A. (2022). Gestalt Therapy Practice, Theory and Experiential
Learning. Taylor and Francis
Woldt, A.L, Toman, S.M. (2005). Gestalt Therapy, History, Theory, and Practice. Sage
Publications, Inc.
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